What I have learned so far...

With 40 years on this earth to study and learn, I don't have a degree in nutrition (my mother does though), or body mechanics (my sister does though)...but I should have about 20 PhD's in what not to do!  As a child and young adult, I was always embarrassed for my mother that as a nutritionist, she had two children who were obese!  It isn't that we didn't know how to eat...I know perfectly well what a well balanced diet looks like.  I know that fad diets aren't good for you long term.  I know that diet and exercise are the best path to a healthy life.  I know, but yet, I don't DO! 

Ultimately, my obesity is MY fault.  I have made conscious or unconscious choices to not eat right and exercise.  I am lazy!  So are all of the obese people out there!  Yes you are, don't get pissed off and quit reading because "this guy" doesn't know me! 

Obesity is a symptom of laziness.  It isn't a disease itself...it is a symptom.  Coughing is a symptom of a cold, but you treat the cough because you have no cure for the cold...same thing here.  Obesity is a symptom of laziness.  Laziness is the disease, there is no cure for it...you must treat the symptom. 

This is a bitter pill to take.  As I type, I get more upset with myself.  I have never thought of myself as a lazy person.  For a fat person, I am quite active I think.  I get out in my yard, I garden, I mow, I am a DIYer!  ...but at what level...  Am I as active as the skinny people that I look at and so want to be more like?  NO!  I want their body, but I don't want to do the work that they do to maintain it! 

Look at a healthy person...pick the person who has the body you want and ask them...what do you "do" to stay fit?  "Oh I don't do anything...I sit around and eat ice cream out of the tub and watch TV" might be what they say, but observe them.  The 3 mile jog every morning, they forget about because that is so ingrained in their life that it isn't something they do...they just do it instinctively.  People who are healthy, and have a desk job, either don't eat (not healthy or a choice I am willing to make) or they exercise a lot outside of work!  By a lot, I mean daily! 

Every time I work in my yard, doing gardening or what have you, I say to my wife, "If I did this everyday I would be skinny".  Well....  You don't do it every day.  After that one day of hard work, you have to take 5 days to recover...by the next weekend, you don't want to have the hurt all next week, so you skip another weekend of working...so one day of exercise equates to 13 more days of rest!  Wow!  You are really active there brother! 

I have made a decision...I like food!  I have no intention of not eating...that is obvious by the fact that I am over 100 pounds overweight and have been for more than 20 years now.  Don't try to change that fact... Food is part of who I am, you are what you eat, I eat food, I like food....so if I want to continue eating, I must exercise more to account for that food intake.  Professional athletes eat 10,000 calories or more each day and they are thin...which means that skinny people who work out constantly can stay skinny and eat 5 times what I eat in a day...so I could be skinny and eat 1/5 what they eat if I did 1/5 of the work that they do! 

What I have realized after years of failed diet only attempts....is that that will work for a short time, but will fail...you must exercise!  I have also spent countless hours on treadmills, exercise bikes, and ellipticals and haven't seen "much" assistance (other than at my lowest weights each time, my lower legs were looking GREAT!)

As a man, I want nice pecs, and a six pack abs...and no FUPA!  I want strong arms and shoulders because I want to get a tattoo on my shoulder that chronicles my life...and I don't want it to look flabby when I get it!  So what of my past experience has been working towards those goals?  Have I done chest, ab, arm, or shoulder work?  NO?  no....Why not?  Because I want to be lazy and skinny...after 40 years of fighting this battle, I am ready to say...the Definition of Insanity is repeating the same thing over and over expecting different results....Hi, My name is Jeff, I am insane! 

Just Wow!

Having a hard reality emo day today at work...

Just found out that my nickname here was "LunchBox" and my office the LunchRoom. 

Not really pissed off about that with whomever gave me the nickname, but with myself I suppose.  While it is an honor to be named after Kevin Smith's beloved nickname from the Jay and Silent Bob movies...I am upset I guess that I am indeed fat.  No DUH!  But why does my nickname have to bring that home? 

Well...There are two ways to handle this emo.  I can either cry myself a pity party, or I can do something about it. 

Doesn't help that in two weeks I will be 40!  Was on Jay and Silent Bob's Store website today and found this doll...I am so going to buy it!  Sadly...he does look like me.  Ha!  Just not the grey hair yet.